Josip Ilicic reflects on a career marked by both extraordinary highs and profound personal challenges.
In the often-glamorous world of professional football, where spotlights highlight every goal and triumph, the personal struggles of athletes frequently remain cloaked in shadow. Josip Ilicic, the Slovenian attacking midfielder, is one such figure whose journey epitomizes this dichotomy. His career, especially his indelible period with Atalanta, was a mesmerizing display of talent, yet beneath the surface lay a profound battle against inner demons and unprecedented global turmoil.
A Childhood Forged in Hardship, Talent Found in the Streets
Ilicic`s story begins far from the manicured pitches of Serie A. Born in Bosnia, he lost his father at a tender age, growing up with his mother and brother in an environment that instilled a fierce will to fight. “My mother taught me to fight,” he recounts, a lesson seemingly etched into his every touch on the ball. His distinctive left foot, a weapon that would later terrorize defenders across Italy and Europe, was honed not in academies but “on the street,” a testament to raw, untamed talent.
His early professional steps in Slovenia led him to Italy, first with Palermo. Here, his enigmatic demeanor earned him the observation of “biological sadness” from sporting director Walter Sabatini. Outsiders perceived him as quiet, almost lethargic—a trait that later earned him the affectionate nickname “the grandmother” at Bergamo. Yet, this calm exterior belied an insatiable competitive fire. “The more you hammer me, the more you insult me, the stronger I become,” he declares, a defiant spirit that propelled him through criticism and doubt.
The Fiorentina Years: A Canvas of Misunderstanding
Following Palermo, Ilicic moved to Fiorentina, a period he describes as “complex.” Despite being a consistent top scorer and assist provider for four seasons, contributing to a fourth-place finish and a Europa League semi-final, he felt perpetually scrutinized over his transfer fee. “Was I really that bad?” he muses, a touch of understandable irony in his voice. This feeling of being undervalued by a segment of the fanbase, even amidst stellar performances, highlights the peculiar pressures athletes face, where objective success can still be eclipsed by subjective expectations.
Atalanta: The Apex, The Magic, The Unfinished Symphony
The true crescendo of Ilicic’s career arrived with his transfer to Atalanta. It was a move almost thwarted by a prior agreement with Sampdoria, but a phone call from Gian Piero Gasperini changed everything. “Come play for me?” the coach asked. Ilicic, committed elsewhere, initially hesitated. Gasperini`s persistence, however, proved pivotal. What Ilicic discovered was not merely a club, but a philosophy embodied by a demanding, yet ultimately transformative, coach.
Gasperini`s training regimen was legendary, or perhaps infamous, for its intensity. “Between one training session and the next, you can`t sleep: your legs pulsate, you`re tired, you feel like vomiting,” Ilicic vividly recalls. Yet, this brutal preparation forged an Atalanta side unlike any other. They were a team that “lasted 90 minutes” when others “were cooked by the 60th,” capable of overturning matches with relentless attacking verve. Gasperini pushed Ilicic “beyond the limits I thought I had,” a partnership that, despite occasional heated arguments (“when you love each other, you argue”), unlocked Ilicic`s full potential.
Moments of disappointment, like this one, were rare during Atalanta`s golden era.
The Atalanta of Ilicic, Papu Gomez, Luis Muriel, and Mario Pasalic was “strong, magical,” scoring freely and rewriting history. Two goals at Anfield, five against Milan, five against Parma – the statistics speak volumes. Their attacking prowess was so potent that, as Juventus director Fabio Paratici once remarked, they had a “scudetto attack.”
Then came the night of March 10, 2020: Valencia vs. Atalanta. Ilicic scored four goals in a Champions League masterclass, sealing Atalanta`s progression to the quarter-finals. It was “the most beautiful night of my life,” a performance that made him, according to Gasperini, a Ballon d`Or candidate. The team believed they could have reached the Champions League final, unafraid of any opponent, even Real Madrid. “Atalanta, in Valencia, changed the history of football. We became an example,” he proudly states. Yet, as Ilicic basked in this personal and collective triumph, “the world began to stop, turning off the light…”
The Shadow of COVID-19 and the Unseen Scars
The timing was tragically ironic. As Ilicic reached the pinnacle of his powers, the COVID-19 pandemic descended upon Italy, hitting Bergamo with devastating force. The imagery of military trucks transporting coffins from the city became a global symbol of the pandemic`s horror. For Ilicic, separated from his family and isolated for 42 days in Bergamo, the psychological toll was immense. “I didn`t know if I would return to play, and when you`re locked in the house, you start to think. I suffered,” he recalls. The money, the contracts, none of it mattered. He wasn`t well.
Adding to his distress were cruel and utterly false rumors circulating about his wife`s infidelity. “Nothing could be further from the truth,” he asserts, pained by the insults she received. While he chose not to publicly refute them at the time, his teammates and family knew the truth. This period highlights the dehumanizing aspect of public life for athletes, where personal suffering can be compounded by invasive speculation and malicious gossip.
This confluence of the pandemic`s trauma, personal isolation, and the baseless rumors plunged Ilicic into depression. It was a battle fought in silence, a stark contrast to his public displays of footballing brilliance. The loss of former teammate Davide Astori years prior had also left a lasting mark, adding another layer to his emotional landscape.
The Road Back: Finding Peace in Familiarity
Ilicic`s eventual return to football was a testament to his resilience and the unwavering support he received, particularly from Gasperini, who once tearfully spoke of Ilicic`s ordeal. “You understand how I was and how I felt. And who we were together,” Ilicic reflects on his coach`s emotion. Gasperini`s faith was not just in his talent, but in his spirit, once telling him, “Josip, get up, we have to play,” even when Ilicic was physically weak from an infection years prior. He pushed him to score a fourth goal against Valencia when Ilicic requested to be substituted, recognizing the player`s capacity for greatness even when he himself doubted it.
Ilicic and Gasperini: a relationship built on trust, demands, and mutual respect.
Ultimately, physical ailments, particularly persistent tendon issues, led to his departure from Atalanta in 2022. He returned to Slovenia, a move he found bittersweet but necessary to escape the relentless demands. Now, at 37, he plays for Koper in the Slovenian first division, a place he calls home, a place that “gave me bread.” He cherishes the chance to simply “enjoy it” while his body allows.
The love from Bergamo, however, remains undimmed. Recalling a visit to an Atalanta match in 2024, he was moved by the fans` chants, a surprise even to Luka Modric, who noted, “You weren`t playing, but the stadium was all for you.” This enduring affection underscores the profound connection he forged with the city and its supporters, a bond transcending mere statistics or trophies.
A Legacy Beyond Silverware
Josip Ilicic`s story is a powerful reminder that behind every athletic spectacle lies a human being with triumphs and tribulations that extend far beyond the pitch. While his Atalanta era ultimately lacked a major trophy—a source of lingering regret, particularly for the 2019 Coppa Italia final—their impact on football, their audacious style, and Ilicic`s individual brilliance created a legacy of magic that few teams can claim. His journey from adversity to the pinnacle of European football, and through profound personal hardship, makes him not just a player of “rare class,” but a testament to the enduring strength of the human spirit. His tale is a rich tapestry of resilience, a masterclass in overcoming the unseen battles, and an ode to the beautiful, often brutal, game.
